In the introduction to the 4th issue of the magazine I wrote that I dedicate that issue to cancer treatment and that I was writing it exactly at the same age (40 years and 4 months) at which my mother had died of stomach cancer.
I didn’t mention that in a couple of days after I wrote it, I was diagnosed with cancer. I had just finished writing an article on egoistic nature of cancer cells for that issue of the magazine. By the time it was handed over for printing, my treatment had been in full swing. When I was told the issue was in distribution, I smiled thinking that it would be fun if I left my body after people would read it.
I was visiting Moscow in September, 2010 and nothing foreboded an important period in my spiritual growth. I was precisely at that age — 40 years and 4 months. About a month before I had my body completely examined in Canada and my doctor told me that those were the best results she had ever seen. I had my examination done on purpose because according to my birth chart there was a period when I could fall seriously ill and actually taste death… After I had my examination done, I relaxed — the danger seemed to be over.
While being in Moscow after a few days of consulting I felt bad energetically and a swelling on my face began to grow a bit. I had several of the kind before but they disappeared by themselves. And last time a friend of mine took me to the temple of Saint Matrena to pray and pick up some oil there, and he also brought me from India some ash from Sai-Baba (he is his worshiper) — I don’t know whether it helped or not, but everything disappeared. But this time I diagnosed myself and felt some bad energy there. So I agreed with my assistants that I needed to go to a doctor.
From the first minute doctors would reassure me: “Don’t worry, it’s no big deal,” even when the diagnosis was made. At first they told me I just needed some cosmetic surgery, on what I responded that I didn’t and asked them to test the swelling for oncology saying it was quite possible based on my energy state. They were surprised at my approach to diagnosing, but it was a private clinic, I was paying and they agreed.
I needed to have a biopsy test done on a lower floor, and I asked the Universe, “What do I have?” On the first door next to the stairs I read the answer — oncology.
They did my biopsy test and told me they would call me in a couple of hours, so I left to consult my customers.
I sank into consultations and almost forgot about my morning visit. At about 6 p.m. Svetlana , my then manager in Moscow, came to me and I understood everything from her face. After consultation I came to her to the kitchen, she was near crying. I offered her my psychological help, with humor 🙂
Her family loves me very much and are concerned about me, and they were the ones who arranged my examination in the best clinic n Moscow. Later they also greatly assisted in finding the best hospital for my treatment in Moscow. But I didn’t stay there, although the professor told me that after they had disturbed my swelling, I had no more than 2 weeks left for surgery, otherwise even that wouldn’t be of much help. My wife and my child had already bought air tickets to Moscow, where doctors were already assigning my weekly treatment — surgery and chemotherapy, but my intuition told me that I must get back to Canada despite of a long flight, which would make my situation even worse, as everybody assured me.
It would be few days later. And in the meantime we were having dinner with my other colleagues and joking that everything was temporary, that I had joked so dangerously about my nose so that it would soon cost me cutting it off.
When everybody left, I found information online about my form of cancer and read that if they cut out the tumor at an early stage, 95% of people live another 5 years afterwards. I had had this swelling for about a year; it was obviously not an early stage. “To end up among lucky men lasting out for 5 years didn’t seem to be likely,” I thought.
At this time I would usually get in touch on the phone with my wife. For some reason I didn’t feel like hurrying to break this news to her, just told her that I was through with consultations and was about to start preparing for the next day. As usual, first she told me about our daughter’s conduct and then started telling me that she had been seriously improving herself according to Byron Katie system, about how good it is when you get rid of your fears and negative emotions, when you live here and now.
And she asked me cheerfully: “Do you know what my strongest fear was? To lose you.”
I asked her (because I knew that a person attracts to his life everything that he is afraid of, everything that he criticizes and condemns): “So did you get rid of it?” On what she responded that not quite but she was near it. On hearing that I strongly advised her to get rid of it and broke the news. Then we began discussing her possible arrival. Afterwards she said that this event taught her a good lesson, she experienced a lot and came up with lots of ideas for seminars, articles, for example, on emotions.
After the talk I thought about an interesting coincidence that exactly at this age my mother died and before death she asked me to find a way to treat cancer and other serious illnesses. She achieved a great deal by her 40 years: finished university, was very much respected at work, mastered English to near perfection, spent a lot of time taking great care of me and my brother, along with my father they built a big house and…
I analyzed that and found that all in all I have a similar situation.
Though I have had a very hard life, but over the last years I reached almost everything I wanted on all 4 levels and I couldn’t complain about life, except for overwork at consultations and tiredness after long flights.
I decided to analyze my energy status and consequently my immunity. What I saw shocked me greatly: My energy was not even far in the red, it slumped abruptly. I consulted such people several times, all of them came not long before they died… I won’t be telling lies — that time I was taken aback. Consciously I gave vent to my fears so that they wouldn’t penetrate my subconsciousness. More than that, I began intensifying them, remembered how my mother was passing away, how many unrealized plans and loved ones I would have to leave here.
Many times I mentally went through any possible life events, including a possibility of a severe prolonged illness and death. I was not scared of it, but I knew that this life scenario might give rise to doubts of the principles which I propagandize and which I try to follow in my life.
With such energy profile it was very difficult to consult, so I asked if it was possible to cancel consultations for the days left, but it was difficult because many people had already planned to come.
Basically there came people with severe fate. After the second consultation where the women were very sad about their misfortunes: one was having a quarrel with her husband, the other one had been discharged from work (which, by the way, didn’t suit her at all), I looked aside and thought: “I wish I had your problems…”
But I couldn’t cancel the training in two days any more. The training was called “Where to derive energy” .
I am signing my books during a training break; on a closer look, you will see I have something like a sore on my nose, it is after a biopsy cut.
I started praying to God to help me conduct this training; I wanted to help people anyway. In fact, I do it every time — I ask God to help people become wiser and more loving through me, but in order to be at least an ordinary conductor, your energy must be in a big plus. I checked it directly before the training — it was minus ten (the energy level as per my system). But during the training I happened to be in the flow and generally everything went off all right. A lot of people told me that it was a much better training compared to the one before. “Might be the last one,” I smiled to myself.
I finished everything I planned to do in Moscow and got back to Canada, there were lots of opportunities for spiritual growth: the soonest doctor’s appointment was almost in two weeks time. At the doctor’s I was told that, yes, it was cancer and it must be cut off immediately, the more so because the swelling began to grow fast for the past few days. The doctors were surprised that my biopsy taken was about half a centimeter in size — they cut a big area of the skin and under it. It appears that in Canada they take only a needle point size of it. And everybody told me that I must be immediately operated on.
But their secretary wouldn’t call us. Finally, when we got through to her, she said that the doctor hadn’t told her anything and that all my papers had been lost and my folder was fully empty. We asked her: “And does it happen often enough?” She said: “For the first time.” Then she finally found a doctor, who wrote new patient referrals, but the earliest time for surgery was scheduled almost in a month’s time. Free Canadian medicine has its own imperfections: doctors’ capabilities are limited, and there is almost no private medical practice here.
We visited a private doctor, a Japanese, who took it to heart and tried to help us get a chance for a faster surgery in Canada but failed and then arranged my surgery to be performed at a private clinic in New York, but my intuition told me again that I shouldn’t go there. By the way, with his Japanese-style accurate approach to the problem, he began to show me on computer and on paper, how at this stage cells could spread all over the entire body, and noticed that it would be especially dangerous if it happened in the brain. He said that it was a matter of a few days. It was a very useful discussion, from a philosophical point of view…
The situation was somewhat nervous because of the high anxiety of relatives and well-wishers, who knew about my situation, so I had to somehow calm them down from time to time.
It got stuck in my mind that when we came to Princess Margaret Hospital in Toronto for the first time (it is located between Mount Sinai and Toronto General Hospitals, which specialize in treatment of all serious illnesses and which, by the way, are extremely overcrowded too), that is considered to be one of the best in the treatment of cancer, I was surprised to see a lot of entertainment, business and educational establishments, where people don’t obviously think about the temporariness of everything. If experts’ forecasts are to be trusted, should cancer progress at the same speed, in a few years time every other man will have it. Right at the entrance to the hospital there was a huge cafe full of junk-food — harmful chemical food; we didn’t see anything NOT HARMFUL there. And inside the hospital there were some more such cafes, besides there were some stands where they were taking donations on cancer research which is inherently very-very costly and which allows many people involved in it be very well-paid.
In the reception room I saw a few brochures, which covers revealed athletic-looking people and I was happy that at least there there was some promotion of a healthy life-style, but those turned out to be requests for donations too.
Next to me in a queue there was a girl, who was very irritated by everything, a businessman with his wife who was speaking on the phone in three languages, including Russian. He was apparently involved in his work and still didn’t realize that quite soon everything might be over. Suddenly doctors were summoned and something like an alarm was raised. A young lady, who came into a doctor`s office 15 minutes before that, felt bad all of a sudden, and they put her on a gurney and connected to an artificial respiration device. Upon entering the doctor’s office, I passed her by and I saw on a subtle level that she would not live much longer… Judging by her subtle body I could tell that she didn’t try to improve herself in this life. All that again cast various philosophical thoughts.
All the others, including doctors, didn’t show their anxiety in any way; for them that incident (sufferings and a quick death) was a routine deal.
So there was nothing to do, but wait. The surgery was scheduled for a very bad time from the astrological point of view, but to ask for changing the date would mean to postpone the surgery for another two months, and the day might have been even worse, so there was practically no choice. The tumor was growing. I started eating like was advised in the forth issue of our magazine — buckwheat, fresh fruits, vegetables etc., and the tumor growth would stop. But once I ate some white sugar and some junk-food, and the tumor started growing. I began experimenting and noticed that food was very important. There were some other important observations and conclusions. A lot of different ideas came to me, but this is a separate subject.
I have consulted many people, especially recently, who were having cancer. Some of them think that they were cured of it after my consultation (about 20 people), because they followed what they heard during my consultation, but the personal experience of it gives deeper insights.
We visited a very good doctor, who, in spite of having a PhD in medicine, basically treats patients with alternative methods and has a very strong subtle vision, in effectiveness of which I was convinced more than once. By the way, she’s Ukrainian by origin, and she speaks Russian, although very badly.
She said that I had to have that thing cut off immediately (although, generally she was against surgeries), that I had no more than 2 weeks for that, then it would spread via blood all over my body and on a wide area over my face. She didn’t see any karmic reasons for that and said that it happened mostly due to physical reasons: low immunity, food, sun, etc., besides, someone strongly wished me ill.
On a subtle level I didn’t see any special reasons and big mistakes in my world outlook either. Somebody was idolizing me (it is good that only my nose). And I spent the whole summer in the sun, which used to help me get rid of all of my pimples, but the incipient period of Ketu gave the opposite results. Besides, in Canada I had very serious problems with my teeth, and had more than 30 X-rays of my face made in the last year.
But in any case, the surgery was no earlier than 1 month ahead, on a bad astrological day, and there was nothing to do but wait and work on improving myself, and it was only fitting to think of eternal values.
That woman had her office next to Niagara Falls and we stayed there overnight, because it was fairly far to go home. They gave us a room on the top floor of the hotel with a wonderful view of Niagara Falls, which from a bird’s eye view looked not quite big. Everything around it was turned into an energetic disposal dump, as is typical in the West, intended for complete degradation of people on all 4 levels. Around the hotels there was low-standard music playing to the max till late at night, the restaurants were full of junk food, and there were different kinds of shows, casinos, etc.
But up there it was very good to meditate and pray, remember the life spent, and I had a lot of different realizations. I will tell one thing — all this had a great influence on me, and now I am not the person I used to be. For example, all my fears went away — to be good and kind, unwillingness to come into conflicts, when necessary, etc.
It’s a good practice to watch running water for a long time, in Buddhism there is a similar meditative technique: it occurs to you quite subconsciously that everything is temporary. I approached the waterfall and watched it from a height.
On my way back I called the secretary to the hospital again, but she only confirmed — not earlier than in a month time. I reminded her again that in Russia a leading professor in this area said I had maximum two weeks left, but three weeks passed already, the tumor had been growing very rapidly in the last days, it could penetrate my eyes, brain etc. In reply she said she knew that but a queue was a queue, more than that, if somebody was more urgent, they might put me off.
Anyway, there was nothing to do, but to accept the situation. In a situation like that I understood how important my nearest and dearest were. In the first place, it is for their sake you would wish to live on and keep on striving for health. What is more, my wife’s relatives were arranging and crowding the matters regarding the official medicine in Canada, my assistants in Moscow were looking for clinics all over the world, although I didn’t ask them to. By the way, in Israel I was told that the situation was dangerous and very urgent, and they would need about two weeks to handle everything, and every day of my hospital stay would cost over $1000, that it would require a general anaesthesia and a lot of medical procedures and that they could accept me any time.
In free Canadian medicine they say: “We will cut it off under local anaesthesia and you will go home immediately; should you feel bad, you will come back.”
Several families of my students, who knew about my illness, prayed for me and offered me their practical help. The strongest support, in my opinion, was from Nastya, who was walking round Kailas — a mountain in Himalayas (one of the saintest places in the world), and it is considered to be a very difficult route even for trained people. She said she had always been praying for me out there.
“The most memorable place of Kailas is its northern slope. It is the most severe one and it was the most difficult to climb. There was a terrible wind. It so happened that we stayed there one night longer than planned, that allowed some of us to come closer to it — it’s the inward view from where kora ran, only few people can reach it. I touched Kailas itself! (if I can say so), which is possible only in very good weather and a lot of other things had to go well too. You had your surgery on that very day, as I was told later by my mom. And there’s also a photo of the southern slope — it is the end of the kora. The beauty and magnificence, power and many other things…
I can’t convey it in words.
We were very lucky, as we made it in good and clear weather, and still it was very difficult to do! I can’t even imagine how people could do it in some other conditions. The next day it was snowing as hell! Thanks God, we saw it only from our jeeps on our way back. Now I can’t believe that it happened to me. There is God’s will for everything!” (Commented by Anastasiya Ragozina.)
One day I took my latest diagnosis, sat at my computer, and translated it — it said that it was some kind of melanoma, and a surgical interference was a must. Mentally I let the situation go, checked my energy on a subtle level — it was supposed to be enough for another 2 months for sure, so, God grant, I would manage to conduct a festival in Israel and the final 5th stage of the course in psychology in Moscow, and so I stopped all my diagnostics and simply began to live.
A few days later we were having our breakfast, when they called us from the hospital and said that something had changed there, and they could operate on me a few days later. I checked â€“ it was one of the best days in the year for such proceedings. The surgery was arranged in General Toronto Hospital, which was located across the road from Princess Margaret Hospital.
As it turned out later on, there came several young interns for practical training, but to their credit be it said, they did their utmost, and, as some doctors told me later, they had done a perfect job.
It was an interesting experience: they stuck adhesive plaster over my eyes, and it was somewhat unpleasant because there was a possibility that my eyesight could be damaged during surgery, and I was far from being 100% sure that I would ever see the sunlight again.
Medical staff was multinational. The head doctor, who just stopped by at the beginning, had a German or a Jewish last name, another doctor, his assistant, was Chinese, who grew up in Australia, where skin cancer happens very frequently, a nurse was Canadian, and I was operated on by a fair young oriental looking woman, whose energy was in a big plus. Everything seemed to have passed well enough.
I was told to come back the next week to take off sutures and get to know the results: they had to make an examination and to find out exactly what it was, and whether everything was cut out.
But that appointment was very important to me. One day before it I felt somewhat stressed, like once before an exam. I stayed overnight in the hotel “Delta”, located a couple of blocks away from the hospital. The next morning I felt calm and peaceful, ready to accept anything that might happen as the Higher will; I had a feeling of being here and now, of being in the flow.
In the hospital they took off the sutures, then took the pictures of me, as I understood, for their term paper, and there came the doctor (the Chinese) and said they had checked the tumor — it was not cancer at all (but it could turn into cancer, should I neglect it for a long time, however, as any other cells in our body), and it couldn’t give metastases, and it seemed like they had cut out everything. They said I must come again in 3 months for examination, because a setback was possible.
I asked him,“What about several tests, which I had done in laboratories and clinics specializing in it? I still have these glass slides with biopsy, and why did this tumor behave for some time like a fast-spreading cancer?” He shrugged his shoulders, as he evidently had no time to give it a serious thought. He said that he had seen that for the first time and began telling me in details what had to be done to make the suture less visible. I was not much interested in that point. The main thing was that I would not die in the nearest time and they even wouldn’t cut off my beloved nose.
I came out from the hospital and at the same time my wife drove up to the entrance (although she was driving in traffic jams from another city), and we went to celebrate that in a raw food restaurant.
It was the second time, when I was diagnosed with cancer. For the first time it happened eight years before that, and it had a great impact on me and my world outlook (I seldom told anyone about it, because I was afraid to put the evil eye on myself).
I was diagnosed that time with a lungs cancer, and I intuitively understood that it occurred because of my world outlook, so I started improving myself, my world outlook and my life style. Then it seemed to have passed. But one famous ayurvedic doctor (I mentioned him in my book “Three energies”) told me about five years ago that there was something in my lungs, but if I did pranayama, yoga, and live a harmonious life, it would be gone.
About three years ago, when I was moving to Canada, I had to pass a medical checkup, and there was some problem with fluorography: they made X-rays four times and saw something on them. I was working upon myself, getting rid of all attachments to the world and to a successful fate. Before taking the last X-ray I felt fully calm inside. They came out to me and said that everything was okay, apparently there might have been something wrong with the apparatus, then stamped my papers and I could go to Canada.
That incident gave me understanding about how important it was to improve yourself.
The other incident taught me more about how much we depend on food, environment, communication. And that, no matter how wonderful everything in your life might be, it can change very fast. There should be nothing to be proud of or attached to.
Also that second incident left a scar on my face as a constant reminder of eternal values, and the higher I raise my nose, the better this “reminder” is seen.
Though the doctors promised me, that after a couple of years it would almost disappear, should everything be good. I feel a bit sad about it, although the Universe has lots of means to help us get rid of egoism and pride…
P.S.: Thanks a lot to everybody who helped me and prayed for me. Forgive me those, who wish me bad; through my sinful actions in the past I attracted your disgrace.
And be happy and healthy all of you…
I want it very much that nobody had such illnesses — I hope my knowledge (stated in my books and on my CDs) will help you in it.